Does anybody else have a sense of call? A feeling in the pit of your stomach that whatever you end up doing for the rest of your life isn't really something you get to choose?
I mean, of course it is something you choose. I can decide to go back to school or not to go back to school. I can apply to whatever jobs I choose. Or I can decide not to work at all.
However, i still have that feeling in the pit of my stomach... is there an explanation?
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
what now?
As I feel graduation creeping up on me, I wonder where I go from here. Does my education just come to a halt? It can't... must. keep. learning.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Missing Honduras
These are the children of Montana de Luz.
To you this may look like just another picture of children in a far-away land, but when I look at this picture, I see the children my friends often catch me referring to as "my babies." Aren't they beautiful?
This year I won't be seeing them - can't afford it. For the past two years, I have had the opportunity (thanks to the generous contributions and support of my immediate and extended family) to visit Honduras, and those experiences drastically changed my life. I don't know who I would be today had I never met these kids.
Living at Montana de Luz, an orphanage primarily for children inflicted with and orphaned by HIV/AIDS, these children are given the opportunity to play, laugh and be loved. Volunteer groups come once or twice a month to help with maintenance at the orphanage and construction in the village, but so much more happens than maintenance and construction.
This year I won't be able to visit them, but not a day goes by that I don't think about them.
When I close my eyes, I can imagine holding Fanny (left) and chasing Ricardo (right) through the playground.
A couple years ago, a promotional video was made about Montana de Luz... take a look for yourself.
This year I won't be seeing them - can't afford it. For the past two years, I have had the opportunity (thanks to the generous contributions and support of my immediate and extended family) to visit Honduras, and those experiences drastically changed my life. I don't know who I would be today had I never met these kids.
Living at Montana de Luz, an orphanage primarily for children inflicted with and orphaned by HIV/AIDS, these children are given the opportunity to play, laugh and be loved. Volunteer groups come once or twice a month to help with maintenance at the orphanage and construction in the village, but so much more happens than maintenance and construction.Relationships - Culture Shock - Growth
Falling in love~
I fell in love with the children of Montana de Luz.
I fell in love with Honduran culture.
I fell in love with the something that connects us all.
I fell in love with the children of Montana de Luz.
I fell in love with Honduran culture.
I fell in love with the something that connects us all.
This year I won't be able to visit them, but not a day goes by that I don't think about them.
When I close my eyes, I can imagine holding Fanny (left) and chasing Ricardo (right) through the playground.
A couple years ago, a promotional video was made about Montana de Luz... take a look for yourself.
Monday, November 10, 2008
Quick history lesson - how this Christian got to where she is today
Some people run away at the thought of church, and although church has been a major part of my life, I often find myself sympathizing with those people. In high school, church was everything I had, but when I moved away to college, I became disillusioned with Christians, to the point that I didn't know if I could associate myself with them.
The Christians I met in college were closed-minded. They were right. Everybody else was wrong. There was no middle ground, no room for questions or doubt. Luckily, I found Pastor Lynn, who taught me that faith is a journey in which we are constantly learning and growing. She taught me that nobody has all the answers, which is the beauty and mystery of faith.
At one point I thought I was destined to be a pastor. I loved my Greek and religion classes, which often tested my faith and caused me to question what I'd been taught since childhood. They allowed me to look at religion in a completely new light.
After my second trip to Honduras, I became confused. I began to wonder what it would have been like to grow up in a different culture or with a different religion. A began asking questions like What is a Christian? Who is or was Jesus? Christmas that year was particularly difficult as I sat through church, wondering how much of the sermon was a fabrication of what had really happened.
Once again, I became confused, unsure of where I stood in the religious world. It's been a roller coaster, but while I've been at Ohio University, I've had the opportunity to grow through diligent study and intellectual conversation with professors, pastors and other intrigued students. One of the many fears that comes with a nearing graduation date is the loss of connections I've made over that past four years. Some of the most important of these connections have been with people who have helped me and challenged me throughout my faith journey.
While I know I can't replace their presence in my life, I hope throughout my faith journey I am able to continue the dialogue I have begun at Ohio University. This blog is one tool that will enable that dialogue to continue.
The Christians I met in college were closed-minded. They were right. Everybody else was wrong. There was no middle ground, no room for questions or doubt. Luckily, I found Pastor Lynn, who taught me that faith is a journey in which we are constantly learning and growing. She taught me that nobody has all the answers, which is the beauty and mystery of faith.
At one point I thought I was destined to be a pastor. I loved my Greek and religion classes, which often tested my faith and caused me to question what I'd been taught since childhood. They allowed me to look at religion in a completely new light.
After my second trip to Honduras, I became confused. I began to wonder what it would have been like to grow up in a different culture or with a different religion. A began asking questions like What is a Christian? Who is or was Jesus? Christmas that year was particularly difficult as I sat through church, wondering how much of the sermon was a fabrication of what had really happened.
Once again, I became confused, unsure of where I stood in the religious world. It's been a roller coaster, but while I've been at Ohio University, I've had the opportunity to grow through diligent study and intellectual conversation with professors, pastors and other intrigued students. One of the many fears that comes with a nearing graduation date is the loss of connections I've made over that past four years. Some of the most important of these connections have been with people who have helped me and challenged me throughout my faith journey.
While I know I can't replace their presence in my life, I hope throughout my faith journey I am able to continue the dialogue I have begun at Ohio University. This blog is one tool that will enable that dialogue to continue.
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